How can one express feelings to his fiancée and encourage her to marry him through legitimate means, while knowing what permissible phrases of praise and love can be said, and what is stated in Islamic law regarding encouraging lovers to marry in light of tribulations and old age? What are the matters that should be tested in the fiancée? Is it better to marry while she remains with her family, or to postpone the marriage?

The suitor is a stranger to his fiancée until the marriage contract is concluded. It is not permissible for him to speak with her except out of necessity, and while observing the Sharia controls, such as not being in seclusion (khalwa) and not softening her speech. He is not allowed to express feelings of love or to inquire about her feelings towards him, or to utter words of passion; this is to block the doors of temptation. The Prophet, peace and blessings be upon him, encouraged those who love each other to marry, saying: "There is nothing like marriage for two who love each other." Marriage should be expedited if one fears temptation for oneself. The fiancée can be informed of the desire to expedite, or the matter can be put to her guardian. If she insists on postponement, it might be better to break off the engagement and look for another girl. To test the fiancée, it suffices to inquire about her from trustworthy people, and then proceed with marriage after performing Istikhara (seeking guidance from Allah) and consultation.