Is wishing for divorce and thinking about it, and talking to oneself in an inaudible voice with phrases like "If you want, then go" considered a divorce, especially with the presence of intrusive thoughts about divorce and a desire for separation?

All that has been mentioned is nothing more than obsessive-compulsive disorder, and no legal ruling is entailed by it. For the mere wish of divorce does not make a

an implicit statement a divorce. Rather, divorce by implicit statement does not occur unless there is an intention to effect it with that wording. If you did not intend to separate from your wife with these words, then they are considered idle talk with no effect. As for the cure for obsession, it is by turning away from it and not paying attention to it.