Is our marriage considered valid, or is it fornication, despite our agreement to marry before cohabitation? And is it permissible for me to divorce my wife due to her disobedience to my command regarding her frequent visits to her family's house?

A man's statement to a woman: "Marry me," or a woman's statement: "I marry myself to you," without a guardian (wali) or witnesses, is a void contract by scholarly consensus. It necessitates the prescribed punishment (hadd) if brought before a judge, and cohabitation thereunder is considered fornication (zina). Children born from such a union are considered children of fornication; they have no lineage and no right to inheritance.

However, if the couple were unaware of the contract's invalidity, the prescribed punishment is averted from them, and the child is attributed to them, and they are not sinful. If one of them knew [of the invalidity] while the other did not, the one who knew is sinful and is subject to the prescribed punishment, but not the other.

Fornication is a grave sin, and its perpetrator must repent and seek much forgiveness. There is no expiation for it other than repentance.

A wife's disobedience and her leaving the home without her husband's permission is disobedience to Allah and forbidden insubordination (nushooz). She must desist from this. The husband should advise and remind her, and not hasten to divorce, but rather follow the Quranic method in dealing with an insubordinate wife.