What is the Shar’i ruling regarding a man who has not had intercourse with his wife for four years due to a lack of desire for her, and he wishes to marry another but is financially unable, and he fears for his children from divorce, and he fears falling into haram, and he sometimes practices masturbation?

The problem mentioned in the question – the absence of a marital relationship between the spouses for four years – indicates a significant dysfunction in the family relationship.

Both spouses must realize that marriage aims at chastity, fulfilling desires, finding tranquility, and fostering affection. The husband should inform his wife of his natural needs and understand the reasons for her aversion, as he is responsible for her chastity even if he is not attracted to her.

The marital relationship is based on fulfilling rights more than emotions. This lukewarm relationship can lead to crises and negatively affect children.

The husband is advised to sit with his wife, draw closer to her, and rectify their relationship with Allah the Almighty, in compliance with His saying: (Whoever does righteousness, whether male or female, while he is a believer - We will surely cause him to live a good life, and We will surely give them their reward [in the Hereafter] according to the best of what they used to do) An-Nahl/97.

Furthermore, spouses sleeping in the same bed bridges the distance between them and generates mutual desire.