Is the aforementioned betrothal, which included an offer and acceptance from the family and a blessing from the groom, considered a legitimate marriage contract despite my absence from it and my lack of consent to it, and my father's unawareness that it might be so, and what are the implications of that for the limits of the relationship between me and the suitor?

What transpired was a promise of marriage, not an actual marriage, due to the absence of a marriage contract formula, neither from the woman's guardian nor the suitor. The suitor's uncle's statement, "If you accept her, then say, 'I accept so-and-so as a husband for my daughter so-and-so'," was a question of acceptance. And the woman's father's reply that he accepted him as a husband does not constitute a marriage. Furthermore, the suitor's statement, "I am committed and steadfast," is not an acceptance; rather, it is an expression of desire for marriage. This is the view of Imam Al-Shafi'i, and the Malikis concurred with him regarding the necessity of a formula that indicates permanence. Therefore, what occurred in the aforementioned engagement is not a marriage contract, and this suitor remains a stranger to you.