Is what the questioner said to his mother and wife in a moment of anger, and as a threat with no intention of divorce, considered a divorce? If so, what should he do? And would it be counted as a future divorce?

If you confine yourself to saying, "I will speak to her family and cut off relations with her," addressing your mother and wife, this is merely a promise of divorce, and no divorce takes place by it, nor is it recommended to fulfill it. And if you say, "I have given up marriage," and do not intend divorce, then nothing is incumbent upon you either, because it is a metaphorical expression of divorce that only takes effect with intention. So your wife remains under your responsibility. You are obligated to honor your mother and treat her kindly. As for obeying your mother regarding residence, you must obey her in what benefits her and does not harm you. If it is difficult for you but does not harm you, then it is obligatory; otherwise, it is not. To treat obsessive doubts (waswas) in ablution and prayer, you can refer to Fatwa (definition) No. 31562.