How do I deal with my mother who prevents me from doing good and helping those in need, and should I obey her in this, despite my fear that she might die while angry with me?

The rights of parents are great, and obedience to them is obligatory in everything that is not an act of disobedience (to Allah). However, obedience to them is not obligatory in commanding stinginess or cutting off ties with relatives and neighbors, because that is an act of disobedience to Allah. Rather, one must be kind to the mother and be patient with her harshness, while advising her gently and wisely. One should be kind to people and maintain kinship ties even if it is out of the mother's sight if that would hurt her, while continuously advising her and supplicating for her well-being.