What should I do with my wife who refuses to return to my home unless she has a maid, despite my providing all her needs, and should I divorce her or marry another?

If the matter reaches a Sharia judge, he is the one to settle the dispute.

As for the advice: It is not permissible to keep the wife in wedlock and withhold her rights without any disobedience on her part, for Allah Almighty says: "...so do not incline with [complete] inclination, leaving her like a suspended one..." If one marries another [wife], it is obligatory to be just between the wives in division, unless one of them agrees to waive her right. Divorce is permissible out of necessity, such as the wife's ill-manners, bad companionship, and causing harm. It is better to strive to rectify the wife, for Allah Almighty says: "{...And live with them in kindness. For if you dislike them - perhaps you dislike a thing and Allah makes therein much good.}" And the Messenger of Allah, peace and blessings be upon him, said: "Let no believing man hate a believing woman; if he dislikes one characteristic of hers, he will be pleased with another." Meaning, he should not detest her, for if he finds a characteristic in her that he dislikes, he will find another characteristic that is pleasing.