Is it more befitting to please one's father by relinquishing a portion of the deferred dower for divorce, or not? And is it more pious for the daughters to remain with their mother or their father, before or after the divorce?
It is recommended to seek the help of Allah Almighty through supplication to mend the marital relationship, and to seek the help of wise family members to strive for reconciliation, especially if there are children, because divorce has severe consequences. If the cause of the divorce is from the wife, the husband has the right to demand compensation in exchange for the divorce. However, if the harm is from the husband, he is not permitted to prevent the wife from seeking khul' (divorce at the wife's initiative) without cause. Obedience to the father is not obligatory if he demands khul' and the payment of compensation without justification. Custody is for both parents during the marriage, and after divorce, the mother has a greater right to custody unless she remarries or is prevented by an impediment. In matters of divorce and custody, it is most beneficial to refer to the Sharia court because a judge's ruling is binding and resolves disputes.
Summarized from the full answer at Ftawy · reviewed Sep 2, 2026
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