Is my marriage to a married man—in the three instances mentioned in the question, which took place without my family's knowledge, with one of them being without a guardian (wali) and with unknown witnesses, and another after the ma’dhoun (marriage officiant) claimed I had the right to marry myself—considered a valid marriage or zina (fornication)? Is divorce valid in these cases? And is it permissible for us to marry again with my family's knowledge?

The marriage of a woman without a guardian (wali) is invalid according to the majority of scholars. Therefore, the contract that took place between you is invalid, and your cohabitation is unlawful if you believed in its invalidity. You both must repent by ceasing the sin, regretting it, and resolving not to return to it, while maintaining discretion. The divorce pronounced by him is considered valid and takes effect in a disputed marriage, such as a marriage without a guardian according to the Hanbalis. This is an irrevocable divorce. If he divorced you three times, it is not lawful for him to marry you again unless you marry another man out of genuine desire and he then separates from you. However, if the second divorce did not occur within a valid marital relationship (due to the contract not being renewed after the first irrevocable divorce in the invalid marriage), then the number of divorces is less than three, and he may marry you again.