What is the way to satisfy a bigoted father, and how to deal with him given his desire not to be pleased and his ill-treatment of others?
A Muslim must honor their parents, treat them with kindness, and maintain good companionship with them, prioritizing them in word, deed, and prayer. It is stated in the that honoring one's parents is among the best deeds after prayer at its appointed time and before striving in the way of Allah. The Quran forbids disobeying parents, except in matters of polytheism, and prohibits saying "uff" or scolding them. Instead, it commands speaking to them with noble words, showing humility, and supplicating for mercy upon them.
It is not permissible to describe one's father with negative attributes. The questioner must strive diligently to please her father. If she does everything within her power and he is not pleased, then there is no sin upon her. However, thinking that she will never please him indicates her ignorance of the great right a father has. Nevertheless, the husband's right takes precedence over the father's right, so it is not permissible to obey the father if he demands the separation from her husband.
Summary from Ftawy's records · added here
Reviewed by El Fatwa's sharia committee.
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