What is a "shighar" marriage, and does the questioner's marriage fall under it, and what is the ruling on this marriage if the spouses are happy and have children?

Shighar marriage (exchange marriage) is forbidden because it involves injustice to women. It has three forms:

1. The first form: When each man marries a female relative of the other without any condition or dependence of one upon the other, and with a stipulated dowry for each of them. This form is not shighar and there is no harm in it.

2. The second form: When the marriage takes place on the condition that each man marries his female ward to the other, with no dowry, such that the intimate part of each woman is in exchange for the intimate part of the other. This form is among the forbidden shighar according to the consensus of scholars, and it is a void marriage that must be annulled. However, the Hanafis deem it valid and oblige the payment of a dowry equivalent to that of similarly situated women (mahr al-mithl).

3. The third form: When a man marries his female ward on the condition that the other man marries him his female ward, but with a dowry for each of them. This form is subject to scholarly disagreement: Some scholars hold that it falls under the forbidden shighar, and that the mere existence of the condition is sufficient to make it shighar. This is the view of the Zahiris, some Shafi'is and Hanbalis, Sheikh Ibn Baz, and the Permanent Committee for Issuing Fatwas, who cite the hadith (definition) of Abu Hurairah which does not mention the absence of a dowry. The majority of scholars hold that this marriage is not considered shighar if a dowry is specified for each woman. This is explicitly stated by Shafi'i and Ahmad, Ibn Taymiyyah, Sheikh Muhammad ibn Ibrahim, and Sheikh Ibn 'Uthaymeen, who cite Nafi''s interpretation of shighar as "without a dowry," and that the stipulation of a dowry removes the prohibition.

If a shighar marriage (the second form) takes place, it is void and must be annulled, and the contract must be renewed with a new dowry and the fulfillment of all other conditions. However, if a judge rules it valid or if the married person follows a madhhab (definition) that validates it (such as the Hanafis), then in this case the contract is valid and not annulled. Nevertheless, one should not pursue this path in marriage in the future to avoid disputes and injustice.