Is it permissible to share the custody of a child born out of wedlock between their father and mother according to man-made law? Is the child attributed to their father or their mother? And is the father entitled to raise the child Islamically despite the mother's refusal?

Scholars differ regarding the lineage of a child born out of wedlock when the mother is unmarried. The majority view is that the child is not attributed to the fornicator (the biological father). However, other scholars, including Shaykh al-Islam Ibn Taymiyyah and his student Ibn al-Qayyim, held the view that the child can be attributed to the fornicator if he acknowledges paternity, basing their argument on the actions of Umar ibn al-Khattab in attributing children of the pre-Islamic era (Jahiliyyah) to their fathers.

The basic principle is that the child is attributed to his mother. There is no harm in attributing him to you if you desire to do so for a legitimate Shar'i benefit, such as encouraging him towards Islam, or if laws obligate you to do so. If he is not attributed to you, there is no harm upon you.

As for custody, the general rule is that it belongs to the mother before the age of discernment, and thereafter the child is given a choice. However, if there is a benefit for the child in being with you, such as encouraging him towards Islam, then strive to keep him close to you with gentleness and mercy. If the laws do not permit this, then there is no harm upon you. Regarding meeting the child's mother, it must be in the presence of a third party to avoid unlawful seclusion (khalwah).