What is the nature of this state that combines the desire to care for children and the fear of death, with an intense yearning for closeness to Allah and entry into Paradise? And is the soul's encounter with the deceased in dreams the reason for the repeated vision of someone's death followed by their actual demise?

Your feeling of longing to meet Allah is an evidence of your faith and certainty. A long life is good if you strive in obedience. It is best to entrust the matter to Allah and be content with what He chooses, because His choice is better than a servant's choice for himself. It has been said: "The person who is content is better than one who loves death out of longing, or one who loves to remain alive for service, because he is the least intrusive and the closest to safety." Strive in obedience and ask Allah to grant you life as long as life is good for you, and to cause you to die if death is better for you.