What is the religious ruling on a mother spending generously from the household allowance on relatives and kin as financial aid, given the father's anger over her extravagance, and will she be rewarded for that?

It is not permissible for a wife to dispose of her husband's money, even if it is for charity, except with his permission; because the Prophet, peace and blessings be upon him, said: “It is not permissible for a woman to give a gift except with her husband’s permission.”

An exception to this is a small amount that is customarily overlooked. In this case, she receives half the reward, and her husband receives the other half, because the Prophet, peace and blessings be upon him, said: “If a woman spends from her husband’s food, without causing corruption, she will have her reward for what she spent, and her husband will have his reward for what he earned.” And his saying: “And whatever she spends from his earnings, without his command, then half of its reward is for him.” This would be based on a prior general permission, whether explicit or customary.

It is a condition that the amount given in charity be small, such that the owner's satisfaction with it is known by custom. It is not permissible if it exceeds what is customarily accepted, such as giving away food, which is usually permitted, unlike dirhams and dinars for most people.

The purpose of the spending by the woman, the slave, and the treasurer is to provide for the family of the owner of the wealth, his guests, wayfarers, and the like, as well as their charity that is explicitly or customarily permitted.