Is what has afflicted me—a feeling of hypocrisy, the crawling of ants, despair, despondency, and fear of eternal damnation in Hell—a disgrace of punishment in this world, or a trial and purification?

Repentance is accepted from whoever repents sincerely and devotedly. Allah has promised to accept it and forgive sins. The fear of hypocrisy is a positive sign in a believer and should not lead to despair of Allah's mercy. A Muslim should balance the fear of Allah with having a good opinion of Him, hoping for His grace, and contemplating Allah's beautiful attributes.