Is wishing for a Christian birth—in order to be rid of the burden of prayer due to obsessive doubts (waswasa)—considered apostasy from Islam, what is the method of repentance for this sin, and is it permissible to conceal this repentance?

Such a word is a statement of disbelief (kufr). If a mature, sane, uncoerced, and deliberate person utters it, they commit an act of disbelief, as Allah Almighty says: ﴿Whoever disbelieves in Allah after his belief—except for one who is forced [to recant] while his heart is secure in faith—but those who [willingly] open their breasts to disbelief, upon them is wrath from Allah, and for them is a great punishment.﴾ [An-Nahl: 106], and His saying: ﴿Do not make excuses; you have disbelieved after your belief.﴾ [At-Tawbah (definition): 66].

However, if such a statement comes from a child who has not reached puberty, the Hanafis and Hanbalis hold that it is valid to consider a discerning child to have committed an act of disbelief if they utter something that constitutes disbelief. They agree, however, that such a child should not be killed but rather compelled to embrace Islam through beating, threats, and imprisonment.

Similarly, a person afflicted with obsessive-compulsive disorder (waswasah), if their illness reaches a degree where their intellect is impaired, does not commit an act of disbelief by what they utter. They are in the ruling of one who is coerced.

May Allah grant the questioner well-being and guide them to seek forgiveness and repentance. They should conceal their matter and increase in righteous deeds, as Allah Almighty says: ﴿Indeed, good deeds do away with evil deeds. That is a reminder for those who remember.﴾ [Hud: 114].