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Is the son considered disobedient to his mother if he does not divorce his Muslim wife, knowing that he married her without his parents’ knowledge and against their refusal, and one of the conditions of the marriage was divorce if the parents did not approve, and after the death of the mother, who was displeased, the son learned of her dying wish for him to divorce the wife, and this marriage might cause harm to the family, such as “scandal”? And is he considered unjust to them by this marriage? And what if he had not yet married her and learned of the dying wish, would he be considered disobedient if he married her without his mother’s consent?

1 min readAlso available in العربية

A child must honor and obey his parents, as long as it does not constitute disobedience to Allah or cause him significant harm. Disrespect (ʿUqūq) is any action that causes severe harm to the parents, unless that action is obligatory. Obedience to parents is obligatory in all matters that are not sinful, and disobeying their command in such matters is an act of disrespect. As for the وصية (bequest/instruction) not to marry a specific woman, it is not binding, and marrying her is not considered an act of disrespect or injustice to the family. If the marriage (Nikah) is conditioned upon the approval of the family, then the Nikah is invalid. However, if the divorce is conditioned upon the family's disapproval, then the wife is divorced immediately upon learning of their dissatisfaction, and she can be taken back (revised). If the intention is that the husband has the right to divorce if the family does not approve, then the marriage is valid, and the condition does no harm.

Summarized from the full answer at Ftawy · reviewed Sep 2, 2026

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