What is the ruling on a woman who performed Istikhara for the completion of a marriage, and then the matter became easy and she got engaged, but her heart changed and she performed a second Istikhara, after which she no longer felt a desire for the marriage? And is goodness known after Istikhara by personal inclination or by ease? And is evil indicated by one's own aversion to the other, or by the other's aversion to them, or by both? And what is your opinion on the Hadith: "If someone comes to you whose religion and character you approve of, then marry him"? And will she be punished if she abandoned the ease and good character after Istikhara due to her feeling of unhappiness?
Marrying a person of good religious commitment and character is the correct criterion.
A girl's rejection of a suitor because of his religious commitment and character, due to a feeling of unhappiness after performing الاستخارة (prayer for guidance), is not a correct approach, nor is it a sin on her part. However, excessive pickiness may reduce her chances of marriage.
It is advised that if a man of religious commitment and good character proposes, and the girl feels an acceptance towards him, she should perform الاستخارة and disregard any feeling of distress unless it is based on a clear reason. For Allah will choose what is best for her as long as she has performed الاستخارة truthfully.
Summarized from the full answer at Ftawy · reviewed Sep 2, 2026
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