Is the phrase "You are my daughter," addressed to one's wife with the intention of distraction and amusement, and not with the intention of zihar, considered zihar?

Dhahar is not established except through an explicit statement or an implied statement coupled with intention. If you did not intend dhahar by saying to your wife, "You are my daughter," then nothing is binding upon you. However, your action is makruh (definition) (disliked/reprehensible), due to the hadith (definition) reported by Abu Dawud: "A man said to his wife, 'O my sister.' The Messenger of Allah, peace and blessings be upon him, said, 'Is she your sister?' He (the Prophet) disliked that and forbade it." This phrasing does not necessitate prohibition nor does it establish dhahar.