Does the daughter's maintenance, the cost of her custody, and the expenses of her nursery and school come from her own money or from the father's money, and what are the consequences for the father if he is not consulted about the type of school?

If the girl has enough money for her maintenance, then her maintenance is not obligatory upon you, whether it is for her food, clothing, or education, according to the statement of Ibn Qudamah: "For maintenance to be obligatory, three conditions must be met: First, that they are poor and possess no wealth." The cost of education is to be covered by the girl's money if she has any. As for choosing between government or private education, the original authority for this choice rests with you, and her grandmother is not permitted to make the choice independently without consulting you. You must consider the girl's best interest, and you should not spend any of her money except for what is in her best interest.