How can I convince my wife to let me approach her during her menstruation, knowing that she misses me but feels disgusted with herself at this time?

A wife must obey her husband in allowing him to enjoy her, unless it is in the anus absolutely, or in the vagina during menstruation or post-natal bleeding (nifas). A wife's refusal to share her husband's bed without a legitimate Sharia-approved excuse is forbidden, and the angels curse her. A husband has the right to enjoy her above the izaar (a waist-wrapper or cover) during menstruation. The husband should consider his wife's circumstances and avoid demanding intimacy at times when she may not be ready.