Is it permissible for me not to visit my husband's mother to avoid her constant harm and problems, knowing that my husband insists on honoring her and considers my not visiting her an act of disobedience, and is she considered among the kinship ties that must be maintained?

The proliferation of problems between a wife and her mother-in-law may be due to bad character, jealousy, or misunderstanding. The wife should deal with this wisely. The questioner has done well in her efforts to remove estrangement and in not preventing her husband from visiting his mother. The husband has also done well by honoring his mother. The husband's mother is not a blood relation ( رحم ) to the wife unless there is another kinship connection. If she is abusive, it is permissible to cease visiting her, with the obligation to maintain ties through other means if she is a blood relation. If she is not a blood relation, then there is no obligation to maintain ties with her. However, if it is possible to visit her and be patient with her, that is a kindness to the husband and a good way of living together.