If a man says to his wife, "You are to me like my mother for ten days," is this considered dhihar, and what are its implications, knowing that his intention was to abandon her, not to commit dhihar, and that he cannot fast completely and wishes to divide the days between himself and his wife?
A man's statement to his wife, "You are to me like my mother for ten days," is a temporary ẓihār. Scholars have differed regarding the ruling on temporary ẓihār: The Hanafis, Hanbalis, and the more prevalent view among the Shafi'is hold that it takes effect temporarily, and the kaffarah (expiation) is waived if he does not approach her until the period expires, as the ẓihār becomes void. The Malikis and the less prevalent view among the Shafi'is hold that ẓihār does not accept temporary limitation and becomes permanent. The Shafi'is mentioned a third view among them, stating that temporary ẓihār is void and has no effect.
The most preponderant view is the first one. So, if the ten days pass without you touching your wife, she becomes lawful to you without kaffarah. However, if you have intercourse with her during this period, she becomes lawful to you upon the expiry of the period, but the kaffarah remains an obligation upon you. The kaffarah is only upon the husband.
Summarized from the full answer at Ftawy · reviewed Sep 2, 2026
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