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Is a son considered disobedient if he refuses to travel to his home country, acceding to his father's wish for him to settle there or for the father to show him off, especially given that the living, social, and security conditions in the home country are unstable, in addition to the father's disapproval of his son's choices of a wife for reasons related to social status, lineage, or appearance, which contradicts the teachings of Islam?

1 min readAlso available in العربية

Obedience to the father is obligatory when there is benefit for him and no harm to the child, or if the father suffers significant harm, provided that his request is not due to foolishness. If traveling to the country of origin provides you with benefit and no harm, then obedience to him is obligatory. However, if it causes you harm, or if there is no benefit for your father, then obedience is not obligatory.

Regarding the choice of a wife, one should refer back to the parents out of dutifulness to them. If they forbid a specific girl, then obedience to them is obligatory, because honoring parents is obligatory, whereas marrying a specific girl is not obligatory. The father's observations about the girl should be taken into account, as he often knows what is best for his son, unless his rejections are numerous and based on flimsy reasons.

Summarized from the full answer at Ftawy · reviewed Sep 2, 2026

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