Does "If a day comes and you ask for divorce, then you are divorced" constitute a divorce if the wife later requests it due to instigation, and does "We are no longer spouses" constitute a divorce if it was a threat?

What you said did not constitute a suspension of your wife's divorce upon her request for it. The ruling on this type of divorce is explained in Fatwa no. 38722.

The husband's statement to his wife, "We are not spouses," is among the allusive phrases of divorce, by which divorce does not occur unless the husband intended it, as explained in Fatwa no. 59733.

It must be noted that marriage is a solemn covenant that should not be weakened by such words.