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What should a 19-year-old young man do who cannot get married because his parents refuse, given his desire for chastity and his occasional weakness of masturbating, knowing that he has strong urges and does not lower his gaze from what is unlawful for him to see?

1 min readAlso available in العربية

A young man must hasten to marry if he is able and fears falling into the unlawful (haram). He should not obey his parents if they forbid him, for "there is no obedience to a creature in defiance of the Creator." However, if he is unable to marry and his father refuses to let him marry, he must be patient, lower his gaze, and seek help through fasting, as the Prophet (peace be upon him) guided: "O young people, whoever among you can afford to marry, let him do so, for it helps him lower his gaze and guard his chastity. And whoever cannot afford it, let him fast, for it will be a shield for him." One must convince the father of the dangers of delaying marriage. Looking at unmarriageable kin (mahārim) is permissible without lust, but with lust, it is forbidden and requires lowering one's gaze from them.

Summarized from the full answer at Ftawy · reviewed Sep 2, 2026

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