How can one deal with a wife who is quick to anger, magnifies trifles, does not obey her husband except with her consent, and has reached the point of asking for divorce in a moment of anger?

This question contains two aspects:

Firstly: Clarification of Juristic Rulings: A wife's obedience to her husband is a religious obligation in matters of marriage and its related aspects (conjugal relations). However, she is not obligated to obey him regarding visiting his family. Instead, she can be persuaded and discussed with, and she might have a valid excuse. It is impermissible for a wife to raise her voice at her husband.

Secondly: Advice: The husband is advised to avoid provoking his wife, especially in matters that are not religiously obligatory for her. He should utilize appropriate times to persuade her, in order to preserve affection, especially if she is righteous and loving. He is also advised to explain the danger of anger to her, and he can benefit from the fatwa on treating anger (No. 33820). It is wise for one spouse to distance themselves from the other when angry until they calm down, as occurred between Ali and Fatimah, may Allah be pleased with them both, when Ali, may Allah be pleased with him, left the house for fear of saying something inappropriate while angry.