Does alluding to betrothal not lead to the very discord for which explicit declaration was forbidden, and is it permissible for a man to get to know a woman without informing her guardian?

It is forbidden to hint at proposing to a revocably divorced woman, but it is permissible to hint at proposing to a woman observing 'iddah after a death or an irrevocable divorce, without explicitly stating the proposal. This is based on the Almighty's saying: {And there is no blame upon you for that which you hint at concerning the proposal to women...} (Quran 2:235). The difference between the two is that an explicit statement can only be interpreted as a marriage proposal, while a hint can be interpreted as a marriage proposal or something else. The wisdom behind this is that an explicit statement might prompt the woman to falsely claim her 'iddah has ended, out of desire for marriage, whereas a hint does not represent a firm desire, so she would not be suspected of such an act.

It is permissible for a man and a woman to speak during the engagement period (whether by hinting or explicit statement) if there is a need and no fear of temptation, and it is preferred that this be done through an intermediary. Islamic law considers the benefit of not letting the woman be lost to the suitor, while also preventing harm.