What is the way out for dealing with people who treat me with belittlement and contempt, which drives me to raise my voice and use my hands, while feeling remorse afterwards, and repeating the same actions later?

Assaulting a Muslim verbally or physically without just cause is forbidden by Islamic law. One must seek absolution from anyone they have wronged, for the Prophet, peace and blessings be upon him, said: "Whoever has wronged his brother concerning his honor or anything else, let him seek absolution from him today."

If someone aggresses against you, it is permissible for you to retaliate in kind without exceeding the limit, for Allah Almighty says: "So whoever transgresses against you, then transgress against him in the same manner that he transgressed against you." However, it is not permissible to respond to disobedience with disobedience, such as lying.

If you swear not to do something and then do it, you owe a single expiation for breaking an oath, unless you swear again after the first breach, or the wording of the oath implies repetition, or you intended to repeat the breach.