What are the limits of the right to obedience for a husband who does not provide for his wife and relies on her salary to cover their needs, in addition to his lack of mercy toward her or assistance with life matters, and his causing her embarrassment in front of her family? And does this include obedience in conjugal relations?

A wife must obey her husband in the marital bed unless there is a legitimate شرعي excuse. However, she is permitted to distance herself from him if he is unjust towards her. The wife's maintenance is obligatory upon the husband, even if she is wealthy. If she takes on this responsibility herself, she will be rewarded for it, and your husband and children have the greatest right to your charity. The husband must remember his wife's kindness and treat her well, and he must also treat her in-laws well. For a husband to consider his wife absolutely subordinate to him and to use his authority (qawamah) as a "wielded sword" is an injustice. He should remember that Allah has power over him. We advise you to be patient and to resolve matters wisely, to seek the judgment of rational people when necessary, and to pray abundantly for his well-being.