When does humility become a loss of dignity, and is being humble towards a non-Muslim considered a loss of a Muslim's dignity and honor, and is the questioner's act of helping an old woman by carrying her shoes considered humility that leads to a loss of dignity?

The questioner's behavior is a praiseworthy humility, for which she will be rewarded. Humility towards believers and lowering one's wing to them elevates a Muslim and does not diminish their dignity, as the Prophet, peace and blessings be upon him, said: "No one humbles himself for the sake of Allah except that Allah, the Mighty and Majestic, raises him." And as Allah Almighty says: "And lower your wing to those who follow you of the believers." And sometimes, abstaining from humility may be permissible for a legitimate interest, such as arrogance towards disbelievers in wars, or towards those for whom humility would only increase their transgression, like the arrogant among the people of this world. For arrogance towards the arrogant is charity. Ibn al-Qayyim differentiates between humility and abasement; humility is the breaking of the heart before Allah and lowering the wing of humility and mercy towards people, and it is a quality Allah grants to those He loves. As for abasement, it is meanness, baseness, and debasing oneself to achieve one's desires and lusts. And Allah loves humility and detests lowliness and abasement, as the Prophet, peace and blessings be upon him, said: "And He revealed to me that you should be humble, so that no one boasts over another and no one oppresses another."